i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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