but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
