When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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