The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
