Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
