just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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