so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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