If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
