On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Randomize
