In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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