ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize