I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
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You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
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If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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