Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
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I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
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I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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