Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
