You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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