Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize