apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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