I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
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