Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize
