He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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