What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
i drank out of a bidet.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
be right there i have to get my cape
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
