it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
