real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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