i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
