My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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