I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize