Only a mothe r could love this liver
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
