i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
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