You're so nebulous sometimes
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
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i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
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Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa