just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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