I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
