I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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