If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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