I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize