nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
