I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
