I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
