Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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