1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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