then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize