and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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