Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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