you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
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