GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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