I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize