How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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