did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
