i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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