so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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