if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
